tipping point

i am so flimsy. just some speck of news about you, that have nothing to do with me and i become like some heart broken emo kid.

been having good productive days last week or so. really want to keep the momentum going and achieve more this year. been lagging far too much and now finding the courage and groove to really step out and up.

some things i can brush aside, but certain things just hook on to me and drag me down. i have got to be stronger and tougher. there are things waiting for me to do. this is not time to tip backwards.

there can be no real despair without hope. but is there really..?

hello, my friend

it seems that you are back.

what is the purpose of your visit? i do not recall that there is any matter that require your presence in my life again.

please leave at the soonest convenience.

i do not need you.

leave and never come back.

another lunar new year

this is the sloppiest new year clean up i ever did. i blame it on being sick and being kind of depressed. this year was more last minute than last year, and last year was a bad bad year for me. didn't really go through my stuff to clean up. didn't really wanted to. no energy to deal with deciding what to throw and what to keep.

being sick is really draining, especially if it drags out over weeks. and doesn't help that i am not doing so well in life these weeks. 'stamina', my manager told me. sometimes we are down and just need to keep it going. i know that on a intellectual level, but emotionally, i just want to quit and leave.

no easy way out.