thrown around

nothing much serious here anymore i think.

perhaps i am too dulled by daily requirements of life. work. work and faces. masks, rather. when i am working or facing certain peoples. sOo..my emotions are kept in check until i am too tired to let it out and run them through me..

how ridiculus.

do i dare hang on? do i dare let go?

for lots of things i dare. simply because i know the consequence and i can accept them. only very few things i am hesitant. this is one of them. it's not a question of what i right or good, cause there isn't such distinction here. it's not a question of what's best for myself. it's not what's best for everyone.

given such a situation, kind of like some in the past, where the question i had was, 'how far will i go?', 'how much will i do?', inrelation to 'how much do i want it?'

now it's simply, 'do i dare?'

do i dare? what's it worth? what will it cost? in the end it might all be for nothing.

it's like a bet.
i have $2.
the bet is $5,000.
if i win, i will get $$$.
if i lose, i lose more than i can afford.

darn, it's obscure. hahaha..

do i dream? or do i dream it's over?

requeim for a dream