rant

i need to rant. i don't know what else to do.

i cannot get my mind on anytihng proper.

i feel like running till i drop..walking till i get lost. being in pain till i die.

only when i am lost and my life is empty do this blog seems a solace. for it is where i can rant. where i know not many will read. where i can rty to put the pain and emptiness into words and make them more real. more than they already am. so that somehow i can understand it better.

but it's as temporal as time. it's there. it happens. but what is it? why does it happen? why can't i do something about it?

i wish i had not head..then i cannot think..if i had no heart then it won't be empty. emptied by myself!

those who have loved and lost...knows what i mean. those who don't. i wish you have the good God's graces to not experience it.