suddenly

i am unhappy.

bah.

the block i stay in..

have become a make out center.

every night that i go running, at least one of the three seating areas will be occupied by couples making out. i really find it strange. i mean it's more often than not different couples.

my block is not that isolated to be blissfully uninterruptable. sOoo..why?

parents conservative?
room shared with brothers/sisters?
exciting?

well..i guess..i'm too old to understand.

woah.

so..the dalai lama said to the hotdog seller, "make me one with everything."

if everyone cared

from underneath the trees, we watch the sky
confusing stars for satellites
i never dreamed that you'd be mine
but here we are, we're here tonight

singing Amen, i, i'm alive
singing Amen, i, i'm alive

if everyone cared and nobody cried
if everyone loved and nobody lied
if everyone shared and swallowed their pride
then we'd see the day when nobody died

and i'm singing Amen

Amen i, Amen i, i'm alive
Amen i, Amen i, Amen i, i'm alive

and in the air the fireflies
our only light in paradise
we'll show the world they were wrong
and teach them all to sing along

singing Amen, i, i'm alive
singing Amen, i, i'm alive
(i'm alive)

and as we lie beneath the stars
we realize how small we are
if they could love like you and me
imagine what the world could be

if everyone cared and nobody cried
if everyone loved and nobody lied
if everyone shared and swallowed their pride
then we'd see the day when nobody died
when nobody died...

we'd see the day, we'd see the day
when nobody died
we'd see the day, we'd see the day
when nobody died
we'd see the day when nobody died
-Nickelback

uphill task

“lean into it, you’re letting the thing control you. don’t be afraid of it.”

i may fall. i may fail. i may do badly.

but..the only time i quit is when i decide to quit.

i will do what i can. i will not fail to try.

when is it enough? when i say it is. not when i fail or do badly. not when people laugh at me. not when i still have the desire to go on.

don't be afraid of it.

survey

85% of Singaporean reported feeling stress.

15% have not replied to the survey.

bah

need to explore myself more..strange.

unmotivated now.

Bush hater

yes i am.

just read some news about how Bush administration people are defending against media's portrayal of changes made by President Obama in contrast to Bush's decisions.

so much of it is bollocks!

55months straight of growth? yes, we are feeling to effect of the fucking bubble that was allowed to grow unchecked Mr EX-President.

balanced approach to stem cell research? perhaps, but Obama only said more spending, nothing on the guidelines, yet. which are being looked into by Scientists now. not administrators, not politicians. Scientist, who are going to do the research.

russian politics? yes, you retards always like to piss people off. building your missile defense right at their door step. NO WONDER, Sec. State have to warm up to them now. DUH!

what's good about Bush? that he have left the White House. YES.

don't even talk about 9/11. or the war in Iraq. It's Ee-Raq. Not I-Rack. Mr ex-president. the only link there with terrorist was many years old. WMD? yeah yeah..some 20 years old chem arti shells that they shot at IRAN. Operation Iraq Liberation(OIL). right? opps..it is officially OIF for freedom..oh..ok..

this is why some people in the world hate the US of A. cause some retards, spoil the image. Blackwater. Raytheon. who runs them? what are they doing? how much money have they took from they government and what have they done with those money?

BZZT!!!

blah blah blah

unhappy.
moody.
sianed.
unproductive.
bzzt!

learn.

everything that irritates us about others can lead us to a better understanding of ourselves.
-Carl Jung.

bed of roses

heard this at the gym today. seems like yesterday when i first heard it on my brother's CD.

still da shit, man.

sitting here wasted and wounded
at this old piano
trying hard to capture
the moment this morning I don't know
cause a bottle of vodka
is still lodged in my head
and some blond gave me nightmares
i think shes still in my bed
as I dream about movies
they won't make of me when I'm dead

with an ironclad fist I wake up and
french kiss the morning
while some marching band keeps
it's own beat in my head
while we're talking
about all of the things that I long to believe
about love and the truth and
what you mean to me
and the truth is
baby you're all that I need

I want to lay you on a bed of roses
for tonight I sleep on a bed of nails
I want to be just as close as the holy ghost is
and lay you down on bed of roses

well I'm so far away
that each step that I take is on my way home
a kings ransom in dimes I'd given each night
just to see through this payphone
still I run out of time
or its hard to get through
till the bird on the wire flies me back to you
I'll just close my eyes and whisper,
baby blind love is true

i want to lay you down on a bed of roses
for tonight I sleep on a bed on nails
I want to be just as close as the holy ghost is
and lay you down on bed of roses

the hotel bar hangover whiskeys gone dry
the barkeepers wigs crooked
and she's giving me the eye
I might have said yeah
but I laughed so hard I think I died

when you close your eyes
know I'll be thinking about you
while my mistress she calls me
to stand in her spotlight again
tonight I won't be alone
but you know that don't
mean I'm not lonely
I've got nothing to prove for its you
that I'd die to defend

I want to lay you down on a bed of roses
for tonight I sleep on a bed on nails
I want to be just as close as the holy ghost is
and lay you down on bed of roses
-Jon Bon Jovi

stepping back in time

had my first exam in about 10 years. interesting.

knew i could have done better, but i seem to be in a rush to finish it. that probably showed on the papers and arguments i put forth. bah. missed out some parts that i thought about and knew should have included.

oh well. next paper in a month or so. just pray that this one will be fine. i hope to get above B. i am not sure of what to expect as this is my first in this course and this century.

still too busy in life. cannot settle my things at home and relax.

hope some days will come and i can rest some. much to read and much to do.

please watch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vTFesgMkzk&eurl=http://www.techamok.com/&feature=player_embedded

please do not be blind.

meetings

None of us is as dumb as all of us.

pains

whatever you do..DO NOT get your back injured. even if it doesn't kill you or paralyze you, it still hurts like mad. and it impedes your life so much you'd wish you can sleep the whole month away..!!

life is..feeling weird. things are fine and going along. many things happened and still many to come, it just feels weird. i do not feel very motivated or satisfied. i do not like festivities..maybe that's why i feel depressed.

i really do not like crowds. crowds==a massing of stupid people for stupid events/things.

of course there are times that i am part of the said crowds.

blah blah blah blah.. .. .. ..

people. suck shit and die.

naise..

Hawking, known not only for his sharp mind, but his sharp sense of humor, prefers option number three. "Primitive life is very common and intelligent life is fairly rare," he quickly added: "Some would say it has yet to occur on earth."

first..

singaporean to fall victim to terrorist actions. it is a sad day for me.

i do not know this lady or her family, but as a singaporean, i feel angry and helpless. this could be any number of our country men or women any where in the world. could be your friend or mine. even our family members.

these terrorist, moral-less, cowards, retards!!! you cannot have your agenda fulfilled in a civilised and lawful manner, and resort to killing innocents and making life worse for everybody in the world. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?!

you have guns and bombs to back up your arguments and make your demands, simply because you have nothing of value to rely on.

this is not the first in the world and it'll not be the last for singaporeans as well. our world is a sad world these days, a life is only worth as much as a bullet that takes to kill.

because some fucked up guy with some money or persuading power can twist people to do his bidding. if he is so interested in making others matyrs and 'secure' their place in paradise or whatever, why don't this moron go first and save us the trouble.

i'm enraged. i cannot put words out from the thoughts i have in my mind.

what will it take for innocents to be spared from the horrors of other's deranged ambitions?

head..

many pain..many nights..

multiple migraine

balh blah blah..